Sunday, June 10, 2018

The thing 'bout loneliness

Hello everyone!
Happy Sunday.
I hope ya'all having great time. ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•

I didn't know many people working as doctors or were a medical student at the time I was about to make the decision to take the test.
Now, the thing is.... medical student is already another thing, clinical student is way up-in-the-sky level of another thing.

I'm in my second cycle now, Forensic, which also means I am the town prisoner, since I can not go outta town, for in case there's a sudden unusual death, we're having dead body physical examination, like anytime the case comes.
Be it midnight, be it at dawn. you gotta get to the hospital, or you'll fail. 
It's that simple. ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜Ž 

I don't know if it's just me or may be the other anak coass ( clinical students ) have ever felt this way.
Clinical term makes you interact with so many people, the patients, your lecturers (the doctors, consultants), the doctors doing their residency, the nurses, the staff, the other health-related students, your clinical friends.
The consistency of this meeting takes almost 9 to 12 hours, it even can be up to 36 hours if you're having the night shift, makes you feel like you are never alone, like you're surrounded by that many people, so lonely was not exactly something you'll feel when you're at the hospital.

Then you finish your shift, it's time to come home. 
Now you're alone....and at my experience I was lonely.
Like, in clinical term, you and your friends won't have the same don't expect much on having your friends come or having day/night out.
Jo is back in Jakarta. Ulfa is in Medan. Since, they still haven't started their clinical term.
Mai was having different schedules. Oli was not available.
It was so lonely...that I just cried....
Like "man....I didn't know it was gonna be this up-side-down in coass (clinical term)."

Second, all the people I mentioned above, the people you meet in the hospital, the are people with emotions, with different backgrounds, different views, different ways of reacting.
Don't be surprised when you just started your day feeling good..and you by any chance, got nagged, or complained. or nicely speaking, negatively fedback by those people.

That is the thing.
That what clinical term in human medicine looks like, but somehow, you still feel grateful cuz' these experiences enriched you.
But, I totally get it now, why there are medical workers (esp. recidency doctors) commit suicide.
Their working hour is 100 times higher than mine, so is the expectation they carry, the emotions the feel.
So...I will always say this to anyone telling and asking my opinions on him/her becoming a medical students, 

"My friends, it's a whole different world here. If you want it just for your parents, or anyone but you, leave it. There are other things greater than becoming a doctor. Trust me."

Meanwhile, I am handling the loneliness nicely.... #hopefully No..I mean it ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜„
It's just since when I had that darkest time, no one was around, so right now I want it to stay that way.
Just let me be alone right now...figuring out how to feel towards these....towards my closest ones weren't there when I needed the most.
I know it seems shutting the doors for people...but I need that in mean time...
Too mush disappoitment in friendship right having good time together but gone missing when needed...

I guess loneliness can do some good when we are accepting it...just the way it is.
May be that way we can appreciate our company better in the future.

If you have a word or experience the same or anything in  your clinical term...feel free to share, in comments, in twitter, emai, or FB...
I would really love to hear others' stories.

Gladys Olivia

Sunday, May 20, 2018



I think it's old story to say sorry for not posting long story short I've been doing great. 
I am already in my clinical term now, to be precised, I'm in my second cycle - outta 15 departments I have to learn skills and knowledge from- which is Forensic. ๐Ÿ‘ฎ๐Ÿ‘ง
And also I made great memories in my 2 and a half month school-day-OFF....ahahhaha... I finally went to DUFAN (like I've been dreaming of it since forever ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†) and I also went to Bali and took as(s)thetic pics with Dea, but considering the local value, culture, and customs where I am right now, I choose to not post them now, but wait till I finish everything and fly back home. ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ‘ฏ๐Ÿ’ƒ 

You know i don't really like talking 'bout relationship in my blog nor FB nor the gram...I just don't want people minding my business too much. I think it's nice if people only know what I let them know, which are merely the surface.

Well, I'm 22 now...and the thought of a more serious relationship is on the board. And though sometimes I think it's distracting me from the main purpose - getting an MD degree, it is still important.
But since becoming a doctor is a long process and there's still a looonggg-lyfe learning waiting after that, so setting the focus and energy right is a mandatory. 
And I think it's wonderful to create the life we've been dreaming of since we're young, like start it from now when the energy is at its highest point, when we still don't have 'social' obligatory to take care of the house, cook for the family, so on and so on.
I'm not saying I am not those kind of woman, I am. My mom is my main role-model for getting it all together, get her job done, dreams chased, family taken care of ( home-made food, grocery shopping, every part of a housewife's task )
And there's more in life when we are able to create greatness and goodness in it. And you can only do that when basic life needs are met, like food,clothes, and safety. I am not talking about the amount of money you have, I'm talking about being impactful and also helpful to others. Like you can't help others if you can't even help yourself, if you still hanging to somebody else, if you're still a mess.

Luckily Jo has been so supportive with all my dreams and projects.
And moreover, Mom is the best example and supporter and sponsor. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

So I think we're gonna take another 4/5 years working our own dreams 'together' to set the base of our home strong, so it can be a home that's full of love and support for everyone in it and send warmth to the surroundings.

WHOOO DIZZZ?? ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

My bestfriend/cousin/sister GOT MERRIED ๐Ÿ˜Ž

YAPH..she grew up... ๐Ÿ‘ถ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿ‘ต

no normal pose, please!

BTW....I guess breaking up with Gigi was (or is it still "is"?) a big hit-in-the-face for Zayn that it changed his usual music to MICHAEL-BOLTON-kind-of music. ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ˜…
But I like this song though, since I'm a hopeless romantic in private. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ’– 

Friday, December 8, 2017

[ r e m i n d e r ]

               even if it is something I wanna do and I like, that doesn't mean bumps won't be there.
when the will power is shaky, discipline takes the wheel and makes sure we're still on track, going to our destination.

Saturday, November 11, 2017

[MOVIE REVIEW] NEWNESS (2017) - How love works in the Z-Generation era

I know this time I've been off for like forever. ๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ˜”
and uhh... good news is that I've finished my Seminar Proposal.
I'm so grateful for that and couldn't thank God enough for all the help He sents to help me go through it in just 2 months. ๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ™๐Ÿ™
And right now, I'm in the middle of doing my revision before getting the "licence" to do my reseach.
Also, next week, I'm going to have the 4.2 block examination...
hahahaha.. Like I can't believe there only 1 block left before entering clinical study or coass or cclerckship.
#WishMeLuckOnThis ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿ™†๐Ÿ™‹

So, this afternoon, I was group-studying with my girls and I managed to download some new movies...for I haven't watched anything new since all this skripsi thing.
There were Despicable Me 3, Annabelle: The Creation (although I don't think I have the gutbto watch it alone ๐Ÿ˜ง๐Ÿ˜ง), and also Newness.

at the beginning the movie starts with today's setting, people with dating app which actually ends up being hooking-up app. ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜
I know it started like super predicatable....but somehow along the movie, I can find myself in there, and to be honest, it wasn't just me.
I remember hearing the stories from my friends.

I guess it's the era or it's just the nature of human to always long for something new, something exited, something adventrous.
But, at the end of the day, we gotta give our own meaning to that, because life doesn't work that way, and LOVE doesn't work that way.

SO... I'd like to give 8/10 for the movie to discuss such real problem in this digital era, where everyone is on the search of something that's 100% like what they want.

And I recommend this movie to all the 20+ youngters and adults who needs something cheesy yet true material to watch.

some of the qoutes I get from Newness :

Paul : "Love is two people who don't give up on each other."
Martin : "You're saying its a choice."
Paul : "I feel like if you think too hard about it, You're just gonna complicate it and fu*k up.You gotta stop thinking ".

Martin : "I dont know, whatever will be will be."Paul     :  "No man. No, see, for love to work and for happiness to work, and for you if you wanna have a family some day, you have to actually pursue it. You know, don't leave it up to fate."  

P.S. : along the movie I was like “ehmmm..this boy..he looks familiar. It's Nicholas Hoult, isn't it?
And yuph!! I got it right!!ahahahah…never forget a cute face..and those blue eyes. ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ’•

Oh..that too-wide smile ๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ˜”

See you as soon as possible.

with love,

Gladys Olivia

Sunday, September 24, 2017

What lovers do ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’‘๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’‘๐Ÿ’•

say say, hey hey now baby....

So what is it that lovers do when they're together?

1. bartering vocabularies

G : "blablabla...." 
N : "yeephhh....babablablaa"

2. transferring knowledge
about this selfish girl at school...
about the kind and smart consulent...
about the homework we haven't done. 

3. obsessing over small things...
like the small,flat nose... 
or all those small facial hairs... 

4. waiting for the right time
until he finishes his Mobile Legend playing session..
or until she finishes her so-called 'important" group chat.

5. reading minds
trying to have his/her mood, wants, feelings figured out

6. letting him/her take your last piece of  fried chicken skin
N : "you gotta eat this...cuz' if you don't I'mma eat it...unconsiously."
G : "hahahaha...go eat it..I'm full already."

7. cultivating the other's preference
N : "I used to not like sweet food, but now you make me enjoy eating 'em.."

8. trynna be a super hero when the other needs help

G : "I think you can say ' stress can be devided into physical and pshycological one. Then how college students are susceptible to phycological stress , especially medical ones."

9. making world-war  III miniatures
hmm....i don't really have to explain the time when you just feel like strangle his neck...

10. but the last... what lovers do is actually trying to  uncover each other's true self  while making it better.
this one goes better with the time...

NOTE : All the illustrations above are from
The artist makes great illustration with witty story...which I love soooo much ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•

Well,those are just some of my opinions..
Do you have something to add on what lovers really do...